There are some days that the universe speaks in ways I'm not particularly fond of, and alas, today was one of those days. So, a few helpful hints that will let you know you're getting older: (1.) Your yearbook photo is in black and white. (2.) You send said photo, along with a current one, as requested, and receive an e-mail that says "I'm confused. I have one picture of you in black and white and another in color.They don't look at all alike. Which one is the real you?". (3.) Your life insurance company sends a letter stating that on your birthday your monthly contribution rate will double. (4.) You find not one, not two, but 300 new white hairs. (5.) You realize that you no longer recognize the people on the cover of People, but the women on the cover of More... well that's another story.
Friday, July 21, 2006
there was an old woman...
There are some days that the universe speaks in ways I'm not particularly fond of, and alas, today was one of those days. So, a few helpful hints that will let you know you're getting older: (1.) Your yearbook photo is in black and white. (2.) You send said photo, along with a current one, as requested, and receive an e-mail that says "I'm confused. I have one picture of you in black and white and another in color.They don't look at all alike. Which one is the real you?". (3.) Your life insurance company sends a letter stating that on your birthday your monthly contribution rate will double. (4.) You find not one, not two, but 300 new white hairs. (5.) You realize that you no longer recognize the people on the cover of People, but the women on the cover of More... well that's another story.
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Want to feel even older? Most students entering college this fall were born in 1987.
1. They don't remember when "cut and paste" involved scissors.
2. With little need to practice, most of them do not know how to tie a tie.
3. Pay-Per-View television has always been an option.
4. They never had the fun of being thrown into the back of a station wagon with six others.
5. Iran and Iraq have never been at war with each other.
6. Philip Morris has always owned Kraft Foods.
7. Al-Qaida has always existed with Osama bin Laden at its head.
8. Jimmy Swaggart and Jim Bakker have never preached on television.
9. Voice mail has always been available.
10. "Whatever" is not part of a question but an expression of sullen rebuke.
11. The federal budget has always been more than a trillion dollars.
12. Condoms have always been advertised on television.
13. For daily caffeine emergencies, Starbucks has always been around the corner.
14. Bill Gates has always been worth at least a billion dollars.
15. The Starship Enterprise has always looked dated.
16. Pixar has always existed.
17. They have grown up in a single superpower world.
18. American Motors has never existed.
19. Les Miserables has always been on stage.
20. Snowboarding has always been a popular winter pastime.
21. They do not remember "a kinder and gentler nation."
22. They never saw the shuttle Challenger fly.
23. Airports have always had upscale shops and restaurants.
24. Black Americans have always been known as African-Americans.
25. They never saw Pat Sajak or Arsenio Hall host a late night television show.
26. Digital cameras have always existed.
27. They never saw a Howard Johnson's with 28 ice cream flavors.
28. Jimmy Carter has always been an elder statesman.
29. America's Funniest Home Videos has always been on television.
30. And last but not least, Libraries have always been the best centers for computer technology and access to good software.
from BELOIT COLLEGE'S MINDSET LIST® FOR THE CLASS OF 2009
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